Friday, February 6, 2015

My Hero: Texas Man Arrested for Paying Property Tax with Folded Dollar Bills

dollar elephantAs of now, the details are a little fuzzy, but no less entertaining. We still don't know why Wichita Falls resident Timothy Norris did what he did, but he certainly managed to raise the ire of his tax overlords when he arrived in the county courthouse to pay his property taxes on January 28th. He apparently owed them $600, which he decided to pay in one dollar bills.

That by itself doesn't sound like a newsworthy event, but is still hilariously passive-aggressive nonetheless. No, the real trouble began when he decided to pay with 600 one dollar bills that had been intricately folded into what I like to assume were origami middle fingers. Each one was so tightly folded, that it was taking the courthouse staff 6 minutes to undo them. If you do the math, that amounts to 60 man hours for them to process his payment.

Given the pay and benefits that are typically afforded to government workers, it's safe to assume that it would have cost them more to count the money than it was actually worth. This timescale also says quite a bit about Andrew Norris. Again, we don't know why he did this, but can you imagine the frame of mind that is required for this undertaking?

I'm no arts and crafts enthusiast, but I think most paper folding projects take more effort to make than they do to unmake. If it took them 6 minutes to undo each bill, how long did it take Norris to make them? Ten minutes? Twenty? Was it even more than that? Can you imagine the level of hatred, disdain, and neurosis that is required to fuel such an endeavor? How many sleepless nights did he spend brooding over a bottle of liquor and a pile of unpaid bills, while folding his paper dollars into origami of vengeance? We may never know.

What we do know is that he was arrested for his efforts. He was accused of disrupting the efficiency of the courthouse and was asked to leave, which he refused to do. When a deputy tried to escort him out of the building, he pulled away several times, and was detained by the officer. He was later taken to jail and charged with criminal trespass and resisting arrest. He has since been released.

Wherever you are Timothy Norris, I tip my hat to you. I don't know why you did it, but thanks for taking one for the team in the most outrageous way possible. They say revenge is a dish best served cold, and I think you're the coldest sumbitch' in Wichita Falls.

Delivered By The Daily Sheeple

1 comment:

  1. I can understand the sentiment displayed by Wichita Falls resident Timothy Norris, but this is a classic example of shooting the messenger. The courthouse clerks that have to unfold all those dollar bills are the people who are least responsible for the existing tax laws in his community. A far more appropriate and productive campaign against the system would be to change that system. Petition the County Commissioners and the State Legislature to revise the county’s tax laws. Run for offices within the county or state legislature in order to do the same. While actions such as this certainly communicate a person’s dissatisfaction with the system, it does nothing to change that system.